4 weeks check in

Today our sweet girls were 4 weeks old.  Sorry, no 4 week photos, but stay tuned for 1 month photos on Tuesday! Both girls have gained a good amount of weight over the week.  Tonight Caroline weighed 3 pounds 8 ounces and Claire weighed 3 pounds 9 ounces.  We are proud of our growing girls! Caroline has moved out of her isolette this week and into a small bassinet.  She is maintaining her body temperature very well in the bassinet.  Claire finished her second round of treatment for her PDA.  The PDA has not closed yet, so we are still praying that this will fix itself.

It looks like Caroline doesn't like the onesie or the scale...you decide!

Caroline's new bed

She seems to like her new bed!

Claire blowing bubbles during our skin to skin time

Claire without her nasal cannula while the nurse was cleaning it up.

3 weeks old!

Yesterday the girls were three weeks old.  Both girls continue to gain weight. Caroline was 3 pounds 2 ounces and Claire was 3 pounds 1 ounce.  Caroline is doing well on the 7th floor and is now wearing clothes.  Very exciting!  Claire is staying strong.  She is undergoing treatment for a heart condition called PDA, which is common in premature babies. She is a trooper!  Please say an extra prayer for her as she has some challenging days ahead.  

Sweet baby Claire, 3 weeks

Claire is growing!

Caroline already waving at 3 weeks!

Caroline is growing too!

Caroline showing off her new clothes

2 weeks old!

On Sunday, September 15, the twins turned two weeks old!  Both girls weighed 2 pounds, 13 ounces on Sunday.  Their feedings increased to 25 ccs so we hope to see more weight gain this week.

Over the past week Dad has been able to hold the girls.  He held Caroline on Friday and Claire on Tuesday night.

Dad and Caroline

Caroline

Claire looking up at Dad

Claire

Dad also reads to the girls every night.

Dad reading to Caroline

In other news, Claire lost her "belly button" (disclaimer- I do know that it is the umbilical cord!) on Tuesday night.

Midweek check in

Last night we were able to help give Caroline a bath. She enjoyed some parts and hated others. She was ready to fall asleep before even getting back into her isolette. We wore her out! Her nurse, Debbie, did a great job giving us pointers and helping us along the way. Other big news, Caroline lost her belly button yesterday, and tonight she graduated to the 7th floor Special Care Nursery.  We are very proud of her!

Caroline after her bath

Mom and Caroline after her bath

Dad and Caroline, how cute is that?!?

Claire is still on the bubble CPAP, but yesterday the nurse gave her a lower profile cannula. It's great to be able to see her sweet little face!

Sweet little Claire

 Unfortunately it didn't last for long.  She was back to the full bubble CPAP and hat today. 

Both girls had their PICC lines removed yesterday and they are now off of all IVs. Their feedings also increased to 16cc last night and then 18 cc tonight!

The twins turn 1 week old!

Caroline 1 week old

Claire 1 week old

Claire holding Daddy's hand

                                                                Caroline's first video

I can't believe the girls turned a week old on Sunday.  Overall they had a very good first week.  As expected we had some ups and downs, but I know that these little girls are fighters!  Both are back up to their birth weights and are advancing on their feedings.  Claire was taken off of the ventilator and is back on CPAP, and Caroline is progressing on her high flow nasal cannula.   Both girls are also phototherapy free as their jaundice levels have decreased. 

Week 29 or Week 1 Postpartum

Last week was one difficult week.  Things got better, but it was rough. Trying to get used to life after pregnancy isn't as easy as I assumed it would be, especially with the shock of having the twins two months early. It was a busy week though.  Lots of family and friends came to visit.  All of my immediate family and all of John's family (who left the beach vacation early) and some close friends came to visit us at the hospital while we were there.  I am so thankful for everyone who came to visit, as it made the time fly by.
I was released from the hospital late on Thursday night.  As scared as I was to come to the hospital, I was just as scared to leave.  Leaving without the girls was and still is the worst.  Each night it is awful, and I hate it.  But at the same time I have to remember that they are in a great place.  I also have to think positively and know that it won't be like this for long.
Today is the first day that I've been "alone".  John went back to work and dropped me off at the hospital this morning.  I know that I need this time to catch up and I am thankful for it.  I am also thankful that my Aunt Judy lives close to the hospital so that we can stay with her.  I am thankful for Northside Hospital in so many ways.  Everyone here has been wonderful.  My nurses and and the babies' nurses have been great.  I know the girls are closely monitored and are well care for.  I am thankful for the time I am able to hold the babies and enjoy every second of time I spend with each one of them.

Skin to skin with Claire Elizabeth

Skin to skin with Caroline Lucille

Now for the ugly part. I feel cheated out of a third of my pregnancy.  Looking down at an empty belly was probably the most gut-wrenching empty feeling I have ever had.  I stood in the shower and cried and cried.  I hate my body for not allowing me to carry the babies longer.  I look at the girls and feel so guilty at times. As much as I know that it was nothing I could control, it still sucks.
I am thankful that the doctors caught the liver issues and monitored them so closely.  I felt fine and had no idea that my body was literally turning on me.  Do I still cry at the drop of a hat? Yes.  Will we make it through this as stronger and better parents? Absolutely. Why we were chosen for this path? I will never know, but we are so thankful for the two little blessings we named Caroline and Claire.

Week 28 (in retrospect)

28 weeks 6 days

Week 28 was a tiring week.  The swelling of my hands and feet both increased, and it was difficult to sleep.  Acid reflux was awful, and I was very tired.  On Thursday, August 29, I went into Dr. Purdie, my OBGYN for a routine check up.  Two weeks before on August 15, the specialist had noticed a slight increase in my blood pressure, which prompted him to run a test on my liver enzyme levels.  The test results came back elevated, so I was asked to come back in the following Thursday (August 22) for follow up blood work.  Those results came back elevated, but stable.  I was also asked to do a 24 hour urine collection to have a baseline for proteins in the urine.  I got those results back and there was no protein in the urine.  So I honestly thought I was good to go!  Even on Thursday when I went to the OBGYN, she said that everything was looking good, and that they would just continue to monitor my liver enzyme levels.
Then on Friday, August 30 we were ready to head to the beach to enjoy the long Labor Day weekend with John's family.  The car was packed and Porter was already boarded for the long weekend.  A little after 5, as I was waiting in the parking lot for John to get off of work, I received a phone call from the Dr. Purdie.  She left a message to call her to discuss my lab results.  I called back and talked to the nurse and she said that my liver enzymes had almost doubled since the following week and that I needed to get to labor and delivery to have things checked out. I explained that we were on our way to the beach, and she said that as long as everything was okay, I could probably head to the beach the next day.
So scared and worried, we headed to Northside. I was admitted pretty quickly and we headed to a room in labor and delivery.  They took blood and started another 24 hour urine collection.  That night they also did an ultrasound of my liver, and I got the first of two steroid shots.  Getting the steroid shot was the first time it hit me that I might have to deliver the twins soon.
Saturday morning Dr. Rush, another OBGYN in the same practice as Dr. Purdie came in to see us.  He explained that my liver enzymes had increased again on Friday and that they would draw labs on Saturday to see what was going on.  My liver ultrasound came back normal, so he honestly said he wasn't sure what was going on because I wasn't displaying any other signs or symptoms of preeclampsia.  A little later the specialist, Dr. Eller, who had originally ran the liver blood work two weeks earlier came in to say that the liver enzymes had increased again on Saturday and that I wouldn't be leaving the hospital until I had the babies. Even at that point, I thought that bed rest would help the situation because I had been very busy that week.  So Saturday I laid in bed and watched lots of college football.  I was told that I couldn't eat or drink after midnight, just in case the enzymes increased again, and then they would have me deliver the babies on Sunday morning.  Dr. Rush came in again later and said he still wasn't sure what was going on, but he said that Dr. Eller was probably right.  The hospital prepared us by sending up a neonatologist to explain the NICU (or Special Care Nursery) as they call it at Northside.  I got another steroid shot on Saturday night.
Sunday morning they came in around 6 am to draw blood, and I was sure that after a day of rest my liver enzymes had went down and that I would continue to be on bed rest.  No such luck, my levels had increased another 150  points by Sunday morning.  That was it.  I was having the babies on Sunday, September 1.  When Dr. Rush came in and told me the news, I was in shock.  Eight days later and I'm still in shock.  I had no time to worry about an epidural or a c section because they were happening in the next 3 hours.  And they did.  Before Dr. Rush left the room, I asked him who would be delivering the babies and he said Dr. Jill Purdie.  In all my sense of confusion and shock, this was the first good news I received, and for some reason I knew it was going to be okay.  John's parents were on their way and my mom was also on her way.  To my surprise John's parents walked into the room about 30 minutes after John said they were on their way.  Apparently parents have some special sences when it comes to their kids. :-)  The nurses put in an IV, and I was put on magnesium, which immediately made me feel crummy.  A few hours later they came in and inserted the epidural and catheter.  I was "ready" to have the babies.
I remember bits and pieces of the actual delivery. I remember feeling sick to my stomach being wheeled to the OR, and I kept yawning so that I didn't throw up.  I remember thinking that all I wanted was ice.  I remember there being so many people in the room, but not really communicating with anyone, except someone telling me that they liked my glasses.  I remember the pulling and tugging then hearing a baby cry.  I remember someone saying time, and someone else responding 11:56, then again, time and 11:56.  I remember looking over and seeing a baby, and then another baby, but not being able to touch either one.  I remember the pull of stitches and the sound of staples.  I remember someone showing me both babies and thinking how small they were.  I remember the pain medicine that made EVERYTHING feel better.  After the surgery I was taken to the recovery room.  ALL I wanted was ice.  I have NEVER been so thirsty in my entire life!  I kept trying to get all the nurses to bring me more, but they were scared I was eating too much and would make myself sick.  I was in recovery for about an hour before I was wheeled to a new room on the High Risk Pregnancy Unit. Everything (epidural, magnesium, catheter) was still attached and would be for 24 hours. My mom made it and John's brother, Chris was also there.  I was told that if I was up for it at midnight I could go see the babies.  Up for it?  There was NO way I was not going to go to the nursery. John and a nurse wheeled me up to the nursery to see my precious baby girls.  It was scarey, but I was in also in awe.